One-Shot: What You Don’t See, You Don’t Get

What You Don’t See, You Don’t Get

It goes without saying that in this commercialized, rat-race, technological, consumer-driven culture, that Demand has become the great god of all time. I know Neil Gaiman’s family of Endless from the Sandman Chronicles covers many of the important pieces of human psyche…

But I think Demand should have been slotted in there somewhere. Perhaps a foster child of Desire?

At any rate, Demand is what drives everything.

Look at the emo culture, or the goth culture, or even anime cultures – all these subcultures which have slowly been adopted into main stream for society’s commercial benefit.

But before I really become my popular culture prof (and lecture on the evils of the corporation), I should get on with this tale. For this tale is a sad tale – almost as depressing as Lemony Snicketts…

Except Jim Carrey was funny, and there was no comedian around to laugh at in my situation.

It’s Demand’s fault.

Demand is there when our customers peruse our board for the tenth time in a row and then approach me with the age old question: “Do you have fries?”

I blink at them, looking past the long line of cappucino, latte and smoothie chits. I look past the small shelving unit atop the large spacious barista – I look past all this into puzzled, worried – and demanding eyes.

“Fries?”
“Fries. Hamburgers… you know… regular fast food stuff.”
I blink at their huffiness.
“No,” I reply with finality. “Sorry,” I add belatedly, remembering my minimal customer service training.
“Nothing like that?”
“Nothing like that,” I mimic back, hoping they’ll get the message sometime in this millenium.
“I see…”

They shuffle away – sometimes out the door. I’m glad to see their backs because I’m busy – somewhere between two lattes (one decaf), three cappuccinos and one smoothie and a sundae. A waffle chit is printing out now as I pour the espresso into the cups.

Didn’t they look at the board?
How many times has this happened before?
How long before it will happen again?

Isn’t it apparent that this coffee shop only sells wine, beer, chilled drinks, specialty hot drinks, regular hot drinks, sandwiches, salads and a couple of homely entrees? There is no small print to read between the “meat lasagna” and “chicken pot pie” that mentions “hamburgers and fries”.

Whenever they ask me, they look so hopeful – as if I have the magical ability to instate some sort of frier in the place to cook up some good ol’ McDs. As if my manager had stashed the deep fryer in some distant storage room – ready to be pulled out and used at moment’s notice for those people who need a taste of Harveys.

Alas, it is not to be, folks.

We do not serve hamburgers, french fries or hot dogs.
We do not have a deep frier.
We do not have beer on tap.
We do not mix pina coladas or margueritas.

What you do not see, you do not get – because we do not have it.

It is a simple equation, really. You just have to think about it for a couple of minutes. Nevertheless, they still come in – young and old, short and tall, thin and fat… asking the same old questions. Asking in the same old way for the same old thing that they will never get.

This activity among humankind makes me wonder what goes on in their heads. What has induced them to think that we as their servers are hiding our produce? (Although more than once I have desired to stash away the waffle maker and forget about it.)

Perhaps one day, I will stroll into our local spaghetti restaurant and ask for sushi. Perhaps one day, I will be part of those masses who eternally want, what they obviously cannot have.